I'm tired!

I am starting to realize the cost of training for the marathon. Today on my schedule was a 12 mile run. Prior to this, I had never run farther than 10 miles. It was kind of warm even this morning, so by mile 8, I was pretty much over it. By mile 10 I had rubbed my chest raw and the front of my shirt was bloody. Afterward, I could hardly lift my legs to do my post-run stretching.

But I completed it in under 2 hours. I averaged about 9 min 15 sec miles, although at first I was under 8 minutes, and I slowly took more time each mile as the pain increased.

We had a ton of stuff to do today, and I am exhausted already. We have friends coming over for dinner, but I'm ready for bed now.

Dang this is hard!

Amgen Tour of California

Something kind of cool happened today in our neighborhood. The Amgen Tour of California bike race concluded in Escondido. The finish line is about 3 km from our home. We drove by the downtown area after church and it was already packed! We decided to just enjoy our afternoon at home and walk down to El Norte around 3:00 to watch them ride past. It was fun hanging out with some of our neighbors and talking photography.

After the inital 2 leaders passed by around 3:40, there was a huge group of racers following about 2 minutes behind. I'm pretty sure Lance Armstrong was in that group. But I'm having a hard time identifying him in any of these photos.

The racers passed by like this: 2 leaders way out front, a huge group of racers together, followed by a lone rider, and then 8 minutes or so behind the leaders, the final group of racers passed by.

It was really cool to have all this international attention focused on our hometown!

Good things keep on happening to us...

I've been thinking all day about how we have seemingly had a really long stretch where things just didn't go our our way. This blog is full of the thoughts we have learned along the way including the struggles we have faced financially, spiritually, and emotionally.

This week seems to be moving us in the opposite direction. Our financial situation is still exactly the same, but the opportunity for growth now exists with my new job starting on Friday. Jenetta's website is still slowly moving forward, but we finally got news about something that will definitely increase her readership.

The online version of the Redbook article came out today. You can read it here. And YES! The author plugged the website. I probably would have written the article differently and emphasized other things, but people are already clicking the link from the Redbook site and we imagine many more will visit Jenetta's site as the magazine is received by subscribers. Here is the photo we went with: Kind of serious for my taste, but...


I've spent a lot of time praying today and being thankful. I must confess that I like the good stuff a lot more than a lot of the negative things we have been experiencing! But my prayer is that we won't forget the lessons we have learned over the past three years.

Thanks so much to the friends and family who have been there for us as we complained and struggled. Thanks for your prayers and your support. Your love and friendship means infinitely more to us than financial stability or business growth.

New Job

Today was a whirlwind of events! Let me back up a bit. Jenetta and I sat down last night to watch an episode of "Freaks and Geeks" and I received a voice mail about a job I'd applied for a few weeks ago. I was thinking about blowing it off until the morning, but I decided to call back. We spoke for about an hour.

I met with Derek today at a co-op deli in Ocean Beach. We interviewed for about 2 hours. He answered all my questions, and I learned a lot! After that time, it was clear to both of us that I was the perfect match for the position. I was offered the job and I accepted right away. We talked for another half hour about specifics, and then I returned to catch up on the rest of my Sony stuff.

I start on Friday as the executive assistant for Kiwaii. It is a startup water company that will be delivering product directly to consumers and sold at high-end and health specialty stores very soon. The website is not where it needs to be yet, but it gives you an idea about the concept. Check it out.

I am very concerned about the quality of food that I put into my body. If we could afford it, we would eat locally produced organic food for everything. But prior to last night, I hadn't really thought much about what kind of water I put into my body. I think that will drastically change. Derek gave me a case of the water to try out. I'm excited to learn more about what unpolluted water means and to contribute to making the company a success.

What I am most thrilled about though is that I think I've finally found a position that is a perfect fit for me. I will be doing organizational things, everyday stuff like book-keeping and filing, preparing power point presentations and written materials for investors, and supporting the sales efforts of Derek. I'll be using the skills I've developed as a teacher/stage manager/photographer/office worker/marketer/writer/production coordinator, etc.... It was clear through our time spent together today that I bring to the company exactly what he is looking for. It's nice to feel needed! It's nice to feel like the weird path I've travelled is seen as an asset and not a liability!

Here are some specifics: I start at an hourly wage that is slightly more than I earn at Sony, but the commute is almost 60 minutes each way. So that is definitely a downer. I start at 10:30 am so I can wait until the traffic rush is over, so that helps somewhat. I will work at Derek's home office, but he plans to relocate soon to Encinitas. That would help cut the commute time in half (and make surfing before or after work a lot easier!) After a trial period, I would transfer to a salaried position which eventually would include stock options. So this definitely allows for the career growth I am looking for. It will involve some travel as we finish production details and meet with investors. Someday, I hope to travel to New Zealand and check out the bottling facilities.

I had been praying that if I were to find something, it would begin before March 2 so there would be no layoff time. Well, I start on this Friday!

There is no doubt in my mind that this is meant to be. Thanks for your support and for praying with us. I'll let you know when the product will be availble for you to try out!

Valentine's Dinner Party

Last night, we enjoyed hanging with our friends at Crystal and Brandon's new apartment. We had a really great meal and had fun just being together. Sadly, four of our group are missing from the group photo because they were sick :( But those of us who were there enjoyed the evening. After the kids went to bed, we got really crazy playing Wii Fit.

We found out that Crystal is an awesome ski-jumper and that I am absolutely terrible at Wii Yoga. :) And nobody rocks the marble balance game like Robbie!

Hope your Valentine's day was special!

What's up

Here is what has been going on with our family in the past few weeks:

- Running improving.
I am finally starting to adjust to the running schedule. I ran 8 miles on Saturday and was able to actually pick up the pace on miles 6-8. My knees are still very sore afterwards, but it is slowly getting more manageable. Stretching has improved my ankle pain problem. It sure is different doing this level of training at 36 than it was at 18! :)

- Latest on employment.
I have a few leads and another interview scheduled for Wed. 2/11 with another placement agency. I'm not too confident of a position through them, but I am doing my best to cover my bases. We'll see where the other leads take me, but I am starting to get my head around the idea of being unemployed after 2/27. We are starting to talk about what that means and how I can take advantage of the time. One thing that excites me is contributing to Jenetta's online businesses. I think that with the organization and writing skill I can bring to the table, we may be able to increase her growth rate substantially. She has been doing a great job building readership at FF and D. We are just getting rolling again on the revamped version of Bridalscoop, and we have some good ideas for going forward on this.

The good part about all this is that we will be working together and bringing our strengths together on the project. It will also allow me to transition back to the lifestyle I enjoyed so much in the past - specifically surfing more and having more time to invest with friends.

The bad part about this is that our income will be slashed again. Right now, Jenetta is earning about 1/3 of what I earned at Sony on her one site. We have seen steady growth and feel the opportunity for significant growth is there. Still, it will be a good stretch before it grows enough to replace my Sony income. I'll still keep looking for another job, but it is nice to have a focus at home if nothing works out for me in the corporate world.

- Adoption update:
Nothing new to report here. There was a child that sparked our interest and we communicated that to the right people, but there is a relative in the picture, so it's not looking very likely to happen for us. We are attending a monthly support group filled with other waiting couples. We actually will attend that again tonight and the special guest is a family that adopted two 9-year old twins. That should be interesting. But in the meantime, we wait, knowing God has what is best for us.

- How we are doing:
Jenetta and I had a nice evening yesterday. We did a photo shoot for a family at the beach in Del Mar. They were very nice and it went well. Then we went for a mini date at Peet's Coffee and Tea on the way back. I think we are both communicating clearly right now and enjoying the time we spend together.

- Other Stuff:
Our pastor is preaching on Haggai. A friend of mine challenged me to memorize the whole book with him. Getting sick put me a bit behind, but I've still been able to memorize all of Ch. 1 and have started working into Ch. 2.

This obviously isn't my most introspective (or even interesting) writing. It's been a while since I've posted, and I wanted to let you know what has been going on with us lately.

Layoffs

Well, it's official now.

Feb. 27 will be my last day at Sony.

I was able to work just under six months of the twelve months I was hired for.

Jenetta booked a wedding yesterday. We can pay the bills this month.

Not sure about after that...

Going for it...

After a lot of consideration, I've decided to try to run the Rock-N-Roll marathon here in SD on May 31. I felt pretty good after running the 10-mile race on Thanksgiving Day. This is ONLY 16.2 miles longer than that race!

Actually, the biggest thing that has been holding me back is the amount of time needed to train. I enjoy running, but usually, I have the time to do it only once or twice a week. To prepare for this, I need to be running between 4-6 times a week and gradually extending the length of my long runs on Saturdays. Life gets in the way, as do all the extra activities I enjoy like surfing, playing wallyball, hikes with the guys, etc.

I wanted to see how well I could stick to the training schedule over a few weeks before I signed up or made an official decision to pursue this goal. Even with working very late two nights last week on a commercial shoot, I only really missed one of the training sessions, and I had a great 6-mile run on Saturday at Kit Carson Park.

Another concern has been injury. I have a nagging ankle sprain from a hike in the Autumn, but I've found that it is aggravated when I run on concrete, and I don't even notice it when running on dirt or asphalt. So, I won't be running around work any longer - nothing but sidewalks around here.

If you are curious about what I will actually be doing to prepare, here is the schedule I am trying to follow. I am currently in week 4. This is going to be one of the hardest things I've ever done, but I would like to realize my goal and complete the marathon in 4 hrs and 30 min which would be slightly slower than 10 minute miles. Do you think I can do it?

Ceder Creek Falls

I went on a hike yesterday with some of my friends to see Cedar Creek Falls. It is a hike I've wanted to do for many years. We had a great time going up and spending the day together. And even though it was January 10th, we convinced Jeremy to jump into the water.








This hike is between the end of SD Country Estates in Ramona and at the very end of Eagle Peak Rd in Julian. We drove to Julian and met people coming the other way. Now we know! It would have cut about a half hour off our drive each way.

Eventually that trail comes out at El Capitan reservoir near Lakeside. I think we will do a full day one-way trip sometime. There were many things we wanted to check out if we were to return.

One nice bonus was that we were afraid it would be really windy up there and along the road there were Oak trees that had lost large branches all over the roadway. But we quickly descended into the valley and the winds were very calm. It was great!

My dreams...

I've been thinking about this posting for a while. I think that is how this blog thing works for me. I have an idea that brews for several days, and then something happens that makes it "boil over" somehow, and I have to write about it.

I've been having very vivid dreams where I remember many of the details. I don't remember this happening so frequently in the past. My theory is that with my current job, I get up at the same time everyday, and I often wake up just before my alarm clock goes off, so I remember the dreams that I was just experiencing. I think this happens more for me now than in the past when I got up at different times every day depending on what work was scheduled in the mornings.

Regardless of the reason, I have been affected by clear memories of dreams. The one that I had yesterday morning was really great. The Chargers were playing the Baltimore Ravens in San Diego, and Nick Kaeding kicked a game-winning field goal to win the game as time expired to send the Chargers to the Super Bowl. I don't know if my dreams are prophetic, but this could happen next week, so this is a dream I really hope comes true!

But more often, my dreams are darker and more discouraging. There is a variation of a dream that I have a lot - maybe as much as once a week. I call it the "Incompetence Dream." I hate it! I wake up in a cold sweat, my heart is racing, and I feel terrible about myself because of it. It is not a good start to the morning. The one I had a few days ago is one that I've had several times. I am teaching at Coconino HS again, and no one in the class is listening. The students are nearly rioting, and nothing I can say will get them to calm down. I yell myself hoarse to no avail. In this dream, I am irrelevant, ineffective, and out of control. It raises my blood pressure just to write about this one. I haven't taught HS for over 10 years now, but that dream makes it feel like I still teach now. I had some bad days and some challenging students, but my dream makes it a hundred times worse than it ever was in reality.

The one that I had this morning is another one that frequently happens to me as well. In this one, I am acting in a play for which I am completely underprepared. I barely know my lines, and I am due to make an entrance. I haven't acted in a show since 1995 (it's been a while), and to my knowledge, this never happened to me in real life. But in the dream, I'm backstage and something or someone delays me or distracts me and I have to go out without knowing what to say. For the dream this morning, I was in "The Taming of the Shrew," and some of my friends from high school were trying to get me to do something, but I needed them to leave me alone so I could get into costume before the show. I got so distracted that I didn't notice that the show had started and I wasn't ready. I couldn't remember my lines, I didn't have all of my costume on, and I was downstairs in the dressing room and not in the wings for my entrance. The stage manager was calling for me over the intercom, and I woke up sweating 12 minutes before the alarm was to go off.

Did I mention that I hate these dreams?

The rational side of me says "You were thinking about all your friends and the theater experience because you were scanning your old photos for Facebook," and "Perhaps these unsettling dreams are just symptomatic of the uncertainty you feel about your position at Sony coming to an end in three months." The rational side of me is right.

But the dreams still really, really, really bother me. Maybe I am just having a fragile day today. But they make me feel ineffective, incompetent, useless, and small. I don't like to feel that way. And I feel that way a lot lately.

Here's where I come to the difficult part. I never know how to end these posts. I'd like to end with "... but I've realized ... and that makes everything so much better!" Or put some other positive spin on it somehow (like saying it is a learning and growing experience.) But that hasn't happened. I don't know what to do with these or what they say about me other than they make me feel bad, and I don't like them. And they seem to happen a lot.

More photos from Christmas

I took several hundred photos on our vacation last week. Here are just a few of them:

These are from our Christmas celebration as a family. We arrived around 1:30 on the 26th and had a great time with my family that afternoon and evening.






These are random photos of my immediate family taken at various times throughout the reunion.




These were taken the day that Joel and Emily left to go back home.



These were taken at Eskimo Hill in Lassen National Park. The snow was very icy and compacted, but we still had a lot of fun with the cousins and the kids.



These were shot at Shasta Lanes. We had a cousin bowling night. I didn't bowl very well, but we had a lot of fun playing on different teams with my cousins.

Jenetta's CVS and coupon tips were a big hit!



These were taken at the Sundial Bridge in Redding. We had a walk and hang out time with some of our cousins and with Jessica and Ashish there.



I probably could have put many more up, but these give you an idea. We feel really blessed to have so many cousins. All of them are really good people, and it was great to be able to connect with them and see what God is doing in their lives.

And as always, it was great to hang with my family especially now that Priya and Ella are a year older and are a lot more responsive :)

More family photos can be found on the reunion blog by clicking here.

Videos from Christmas

I experimented with taking videos this Christmas. Here are the better ones - check them out:

This one is of my family gathered to open gifts. My dad is thinking "I'm just looking at my beautiful family," right now.



This one is of my dad reading Luke Ch. 2. This is really funny to me. What happens when you add two 1-year olds to a family tradition? Chaos!



This one is of Joel playing with the helicopter that my dad got for Christmas.



This last one is Jenetta singing with Priya. As with most things with little kids and video, by the time you get the camera out, they are usually finished. But the little bit we got was still pretty cute.

Last Sunday at Candlestick Park

Last Sunday, I went with my dad, Judy, Kyle, and Joel to the 49ers - Redskins game. It was sad to say goodbye to Judy and Kyle after the game, but it sure was an exciting game! The Redskins tied the score with just over a minute to go in the 4th, but the home team put together a great drive to set up a game-winning field goal as time expired.

What made this most special was that it was Kyle's first NFL game, so I was really glad to be able to share that experience with him. I got a little grief for wearing a Chargers jersey to the game, but there were a few of us there wearing San Diego stuff. Plus, my team clobbered Denver later that night!